The SpeakEasy

Hot Rod Girl (1956)

2008-04-17T00:46:00.000-07:00

(1956)
Director: Leslie H. Martinson

Starring: Lori Nelson, John Smith, Frank Gorshin, Chuck Connors, Russell Thorson, and Mark Andrews

Them crazy hot rodding kids, with their rock n roll music and television sets...why in my day.....

Sorry...started to sound like my grandfather there for a minute. Now, when I first purchased this DVD at a local K-Mart, basically I was expecting some good ol' fashioned juvenile delinquent fun. Y'know...chicken races, gang rumbles, a swinging rockabilly soundtrack, drinking soda pop straight from the bottle (that stuff'll rot yer teeth, according to dear ol' late granddad...'course this was a man who chewed tobacco, one of the most disgusting habits on the face of the planet...so what did he know? ). What I get is= Frank Gorshin (as a teenage goofball nicknamed "Flattop"), Chuck Connors (as the cop with a heart of gold), and some guy named John Smith as the whiniest mechanic in history...I mean, this guy broods so much, Hamlet stopped by and said, "Hey buddy...lighten it up a bit."

THE PLOT: Lori Nelson portrays the "Hot Rod Girl" from the title, and her boyfriend is the aforementioned mechanic...whom I will from here on out refer to as "Blubberpuss". It seems Ol' Blubberpuss was quite a hot rodder in his day, but has gotten older and much wiser, and doesn't want any of the younger kids, especially his brother, getting in the same troubles he did. So, he's teamed with police officer Ben (Chuck Connors) and they've set up a racetrack for these gear monkey teenagers, so that they can hotrod in an environment designed for it, and not out on the streets, which seems to be getting alot of them in trouble, especially one of Blubberpuss's brother's friends, "Flattop" (Frank Gorshin).

Everything seems fine until one afternoon, after a constructive day of burning tires down at Ye Olde Speedway, Blubberpuss and his brother are on their way home in a sweet T Bucket, and a local hoodlum challenges them to a race. Though the mechanic protests, his wiry sibling won't listen...and it all ends in a wreck that kills the younger brother...and leaves Blubber with more gulit and angst than friggin' Peter Parker.

Then, if things weren't bad enough..some punk from outta town rolls into the burg, looki' to rumble with his hot rod Lincoln. This guy starts hittin' on ol' Blubberpuss' ladyfriend (Lori Nelson, of REVENGE OF THE CREATURE fame...who, because of the lack of budget on this flick, was asked to use her own car in the sequences in which she's racing), and that's not the end of his troubles. "Flattop gets suckered into a chicken race with the stranger and loses...pushing Blubber to the breaking point. They race, Blubberpuss wins. The End.

Interesting side note- director Leslie Martinson would team with Frank Gorshin again, in 1966, when Martinson would directed the big screen BATMAN The Movie, featuring Gorshin as The Riddler.

Lori Nelson, who portrays the Hot Rod Girl of the title, was a mainstay of 1950's cinema, starring in such films as the aforementioned last installment of "The Creature from the Black Lagoon" series, REVENGE OF THE CREATURE, HOW TO MARRY A MILLIONAIRE, and several Roger Corman productions of the day.

Chuck Connors, besides being the detective Ben in this flick, would go on to fame as the star of THE RIFLEMAN (and my personal favorite, BRANDED). In my opinion, though, he'll never top his performance in one of my personal favorite episodes of the 1950s ADVENTURES OF SUPERMAN, "Flight to the North" in which he portrays hillbilly "Seymore Superman" opposite the late George Reeves.

Recommended for fans of the Rifleman...or corny 1960s nightclub impressionists. Detroit steel junkies such as myself may find some interest in this flick as well.

Doc Savage: Man of Bronze (1975)

2008-04-10T21:41:00.000-07:00

(1975 Warner Bros.) Director: Micheal Anderson Starring: Ron Ely

Never fear...Doc Savage is here.....

...whoop-de-doo.
Not necessarily the most flattering portrait of the Man of Bronze, 1975's film adaptation of the classic pulp hero created by Kenneth Robeson is a camp relic of a simpler time. For some reason beyond my understanding, this flick plays like some demented episode of The Love Boat for me....

Now...I'm a huge fan of the character. So much so that I've nearly completed a set of the 1970s Bantam paperbacks. But this George Pal-produced fiasco is....just too cute for it's own good. That would be the best way to put it. Sure, Ely makes a fine Doc, and the casting is dead-on (likeness-wise)..but the storyline, while very much like one of the pulp adventures, is chock full of awful camp humor. Imagine a bad parody of the '60s Batman television show, and you'll get an idea of what I'm talkin' about....

The Plot: We open on a very patriotic image of Doc (Ron Ely) riding a snowmobile to his Fortress of Solitude and then images of Doc in his skivvies meditating in the Arctic wastes....just to show us all that he's one tough sumbitch. He then receives a telepathic message that there's trouble in New York, because adding empathy to Doc's impressive list of attributes seemed to be a fairly easy way to cut back on the budget of this film. Exposition is such an over-rated storytelling device, anyways.....

We then cut to New York, 1936...we know this because of a big honkin' title card. Anytime a period-piece film has to rely on coming straight out and flat telling the audience that it's not set in the present is always a bad sign. After an failed assassination attempt on Doc by a South America native that resembles Peter Fonda in pancake makeup (a sequence remarkably similar to the opening of PUMAMAN, to beat all) Doc and his cronies are alerted to something fishy involving the death of his father and some land he's inherited south of the border. Doc makes use of some of his amazing vehicles (everything he owns seems to have his name...or should I say, merchandising logo, stenciled on it...something tells me they had bigger plans for this film than actually happened....possibly because it bombed in a big way), Doc and crew make the trek south , along the way running into the stereotypical Bond-villain type bad guy, Captain Seas. Seas has a hand in Savage's father's death, mainly because the land in South America contains a boiling lake of molten gold. Some of this second-rate Lex Luthor's henchmen are natives who have the amazing ability to make cartoon snakes appear in mid-air and attack their enemies. The special effects in this flick are no STAR WARS, that's for sure.

After being captured by Seas, Doc and his gang fight to stop Seas and take back the Savage family birthright. The fight sequence during the climax between Doc and Seas is hilarious, for they use several different fighting styles, starting out with sumo...for alot of unintentionally funny results. Each time they change a fighting style, a titles card is added to the screen describing what it is (see below).......

All in all, a good time waster. DOC SAVAGE: Man of Bronze suffers from it's over-abundant use of camp humor, which must have been viewed at the time of it's release in the mid-1970s as fairly childish to the majority of the general audience of the era. It's odd to think that had this film been released, say, a few years earlier in the late 1960s, during the heyday of Batmania and films like Barbarella, it woulda probably went over like gangbusters. Still highly recommended for Doc fans and sumo lovers everywhere.

THE CORPSE GRINDERS (1971)

2008-04-10T21:20:00.000-07:00

(1971) Director: Ted V. Mikels Starring: Sean Kenney, Monika Kelley, Sanford Mitchell, J. Byron Foster...and the cast of "Cats Can't Dance"...
Heeheeheeeheheee....heh...hee....

Oh, man...my side hurts.

This is fuckin' great. God Bless Ted V. Mikels....

Heh....hehee....

>BWA-HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHA!!!!!< style="font-weight: bold;">The Plot:

Mas hysteria explodes everywhere when felines begin being thrown from off-screen...ahem...um, I mean.."attacking" (yeah, that's it!) the masters Why? Because Morris the Cat is actually the Alien Anti-Christ!!!!!!

Sorry...decided to have a 1970s marathon here at the house over the weekend and watched Larry Cohen's GOD TOLD ME TO..right after this flick...

Anyways...it seems some shoddy business practices have caused the local cat food cannery to start losing some of it's surplus of raw materials, and they start substituting human by-products.

WHY DOESN'T ANYONE LISTEN TO ME!!!!! MEOW MIX IS MADE OF PEOPLE! PEOPLE!!!!!!!

Sorry...always wanted to do that. Who woulda ever thought that the original name of the Soylent Corporation was Purina?
The cops get wind of this, and the cat food processors get their just desserts with the help of their own cat food grinder. Oh bitter irony...you are a cold mistress.

THE END.

This why I don't even attempt to try and eat healthy.

My sister and mother recently joined Weight Watchers, God Bless 'em...it seems to really be helping them. But, with their talk of "counting points" and "what I can't eat", it makes it sound like these meeting they attend involve some sorta religious cult. I jokingly told the other day not to drink any of the Kool-Aid. Wanna real horror story about the stuff ya eat that ironically involves another of Mikel's epics? My mom and dad useta own a little mom n' pop type country general store, where they sold cold cut meats. take a look at the ingredients on bologna or hot dogs, and you'll notice a little product called "bioearthian"...
What's that? Earth worms...no lie...looks like Ted wasn't too far off with THE WORM EATERS, eh?
Jeez....who woulda thought that when I grew up, smoking and drinking would be the healthiest vices I could have?

Above: A feline that owns me....

BILLY THE KID vs. DRACULA (1964)

2008-04-09T21:16:00.000-07:00

(1966) Starring: Roy Barcroft, Marjorie Bennett,Jr., Harry Carey, Olive Carey, John Carradine, William Challee, Charlita
Director: William Beaudine

This film belongs in a category I like to refer to as the "Lost Genres"...
Y'know, like cliffhanger serials and blaxploitation films, the Horror/Fantasy Western has went the way of the do-do bird and vanished from the face of the Earth. Unlike the other two above-mentioned "Lost Genres", the mix of Wild West shenanigans and elements of the imagination just never seemed to click with the movie-going public, making one wonder why the people behind such projects even bothered. Or, more likely, "What the hell were they thinkin'/drinkin'?!?!" (Your choice..)

BILLY THE KID vs. DRACULA is one of those type of films. While good for a few unintentional laughs, the reason for it's existence boggles my mind. Was it the fact that Westerns and Horror films at the time of this production were the two most profitable types of films to make that led to the decision to mix elements from both into one film? Let's hope so, because if this was someone's idea of artistic expression (seeing as how money and art are the only reasons in my mind to make a movie) , we're either dealing with the visions of a madman or a talentless hack.

The Plot: "Billy the Kid vs. Dracula" opens somewhere out on the range, with an elderly European couple (if one is to take their forced accents for granted) and their daughter Lisa camping out under the stars of a beautiful day-for-night shot. "Mama" awakens from a terrible nightmare , probably brought on by the chirping (No..really.) of the rubber bat hovering just above the family wagon. She begins ranting about vampires, and checks the darling Lisa, and after she's confident that she hasn't been violated by nosferatu, resumes her nightly rest.
This scene confirms that Europeans (even ones with cheesy fake accents), much like the underworld community of Gotham City, are a cowardly and superstitious lot.

Enter stage right John Carradine (jeez...was this guy always 100 years old?) as the fiendish king of vampires, Dracula. Dressed very much like Mandrake the Magician (or The Wizard of Gore, take yer pick), he startles the now-awakened Lisa and hits her with what I have affectionately deemed the "Ol' Vampire Hyp-Mo-Tize Whammy", which involves shining a red heat lamp in Carradine's face and having him look all scary and stuff. I could be mistaken, though, for this may be a natural reaction for Ol' John, turning beet red, because he was involved in such a shoddy production, but sadly one will never know for he has passed away and his son David (of "Deathrace 2000" and "Kung Fu" fame) has rightfully taken his father's mantle of King of the Hammy Actors who appear in no-budget drivel. We are then introduced to Billy the Kid (portrayed by Chuck Courtney) , who has given up his life of crime and reformed. He now has a job as a foreman on the Bentley ranch and is in love with Betty Bentley (Plowman) whom he plans to marry, if only he can get permission from Betty's long-lost uncle, her only living relative....well, that is, who was alive until ol' Drac stopped his stagecoach and murders him and decides to take his place. Oh yeah....and the aforementioned European couple? after their daughter dies from severe blood loss, Billy runs across them in their period of mourning and offers them a job at the ranch. Don'tcha just love pleasant coincidences?

Well, to make a long story short: Drac shows up posin' as Betty's uncle, gets on Billy's bad side by firing him from his foreman job and forbiddin' him from seeing Betty, all because after Drac sees a picture of her, he gets the hots for her.....maybe that's why his face gets all red when he apllies the Whammy on her...he just all flustered and twitterpated. The kindly European woman gives Billy an education on the Van Helsing Way of vampire disposal, Drac and Billy fight (during the daytime...which I thought was hilarious because of all the obvious day-for-night shots mixed in with obvious night shots) ending with a wooden stake thru Drac's chest that turns him (off-screen) into a plastic skeleton with a cape. The End.

Carradine considered this his worst film ('course, after seeing THE UNEARTHLY, I personally he shoulda reconsidered), and stated that he did it only for the money to fund his Shakespearean theatre company. BILLY THE KID vs. DRACULA was directed by William Beaudine, who got his start in the silent era and is best known for directing Bowery Boys shorts, "Bela Lugosi Meets the Brooklyn Gorilla", and an amazing 70 (!) episodes of "Lassie". Nominated for a Golden Turkey Award, this film went on to become a minor cult classic, and originally appeared on a double bill with another personal favorite of mine, the even more ridulous sounding JESSE JAMES meets FRANKENSTEIN's DAUGHTER. Highly reccommended to Psychotronic fans and anyone who will watch anything with a rubber bat in it.

I highly recommend the Cheezy Flix DVD (pictured above), which contains a highly informative and hilarious commentary by Drive-In expert, Joe Bob Briggs.

The Ghost f Frankenstein (1942 Universal Pictures)

2008-04-09T20:59:00.001-07:00

(1942 Universal Pictures) Director: Erle C. Kenton Starring: Cedric Hardwicke, Lionel Atwill, Lon Chaney Jr., Bela Lugosi, Ralph Bellamy, Evelyn Ankers

A few years back when they were released, I bought the Universal Monsters Legacy collections....and, recently decided to finally watch 'em, rather than have them sit around on my DVD shelves gathering dust...

....and boy, am I havin' a blast. These things are great, and for the number of flicks available on each of the three sets (Frankenstein, Dracula, and the Wolfman) along with the tons of extras, the price (I paid a cool 19 bones apiece for 'em) can't be beat with a stick. While my favorites of Universal's golden age of horror have always been either The Mummy (with Karloff) or The Invisible Man (with Claude Rains), my tastes, as always, tend to gravitate towards the not-necessarily cheesier end of the spectrum, but certainly cheaper by way of budget end (though they usually end up being both) of the studio's latter day terror flick productions.

And The Ghost of Frankenstein definitely is one of those cases. The fourth of five Frankenstein films produced by Universal, "Ghost" was the beginning of the formula in which the plot line moved further away from Mary Shelley's original novel (like the original 1931 film is anything close to it to begin with) and the Creature basically became not so much a character himself, but instead a set-piece to drive the principle actors towards his eventually re-animation.

The Plot: The town council of the lovely village of Frankenstein convene after deciding to blame all of their troubles on the "accursed Frankenstein family" and their beloved monster. Wouldn't local civil proceedings be much funner if this was a probable course of action? I mean, I've sit in on some local Chamber of Commerce meetings that woulda been a hoot if someone decreed that a zoning ordinance couldn't be passed because of the old crazy-ass doctor who lives in the spooky house at the end of town was re-animating bastard creations of science again. Hell...I'd vote for it. I'd then grab a rake and/or hoe and join the mob to hunt him down. What can I say? I come from a long line of Republicans and witch hunts are in our blood....

Ygor the Hunchback (Bela Lugosi) is still hanging out in the ruins of the Frankenstein homestead after the events of the previous flick, Son of Frankenstein (1939), and the town mob assault the castle, blowing it up, releasing the creature from his entombment in the sulfur pit located below Doc F's old lab. The two then take to the road, in search of Wolf Von Frankenstein's brother, Ludwig (Cedric Hardwicke) hoping he has the knowledge to "fix" the ailing monster. Jesus...for a looney quack, Henry Frankenstein definitely made time to sire enough offspring to populate a small town, it seems. Along the way, we meet Ludwig and his medical associate, Dr. Bohmer (Lionel Atwill), Ludwig's former teacher who secretly covets his former pupil's accomplishments. Whaddaya expect? He's Lionel Atwill...he's bound to be a heavy.

After arriving at Ludwig's residence, Ygor blackmails Ludwig into helping them, and after examining the creature, Frankenstein comes to a startling conclusion. You guessed it: brain transplant. I wonder if MetLife covers such a procedure, and if so, do they consider it cosmetic? Ygor secretly plans with Bohmer to have his brain taken from his misshapen body and placed into the Creature's noggin, with disastrous results. The End.

Some Conclusions I Have Come To After Viewing This Film:

Being struck by lightning and entombed in sulfur have rejuvenating effects on the human body.
All Europeans speak perfect English...some with heavy British accents.
Blackmail is easy when you buddy up with bastard creations of science gone mad.

If yer last name is "Frankenstein", perhaps it's a wise idea to have it legally changed.
Superhuman monsters really dig creepy swami music of the horn variety.
Public trials for re-animated undead beasts----not a good idea.
Reading from your father's journal will cause flashbacks to footage from earlier film in your franchise.
Kenneth Strickfadden's electrical equipment is haunted by rear projection images.
Europeans draw conclusions quickly and are enraged by coincidence, especially in connection to a crime, with or without substantial evidence.

The Ghost of Frankenstein, even though more formula and cliche than actual plot, is a fun romp through a more subdued and innocent period in horror movie history. Just sit back and have fun...and have a few giggles giving thought to the fact that at one point this was as scary as it got. Highly recommended....

No Holds Barred (1987)

2008-04-04T07:44:00.000-07:00

(1987 Columbia Pictures) Director: Thomas J. Wright Starring: Hulk Hogan, Kurt Fuller, Joan Severance, Tiny Lister

Things I Learned From This Movie:

1.) Contrary to popular belief, professional wrasslin' is REAL.
2.) Hulk Hogan possesses herculean...nay, super human strength.
3.) A great way to work out the upper body is punching your fucking fists through concrete blocks suspended on chains.
4.) Need a place to exercise? Try you local steel foundry while it's in operation.
5.) Ladies...never share a hotel room with the Hulkster.....

Okay.....No Holds Barred, the first top billing cinematic opus of the Man with the 24 Inch pythons (Hogan's only previous attempt at a film role had been as wrassler "Thunderlips" in one of Stallone's Rocky cash cows) demonstrates, above all, that for an action film....this flick makes a pretty good science fiction comedy. Why sci-fi, you say?

Read above statement Number #1

The Plot: Hogan portrays "Rip", not a real stretch, seeing as how Rip is a professional wrestler who steals alot of his gimmick from former squared-circle veteran Superstar Billy Graham. Kinda like a guy named....um....Hulk Hogan. "Rip" is the champion of some fictional movie federation and adored by the public. Just like the real world!

A slimy, rival sports promoter named Brell (Kurt Fuller) wants Rip for his own uses, but Rip sees him for the heal he is and turns him down.
Brell proceeds to try and kidnap Rip. Jesus, sports promotion seems alot like racketeering in this flick. Just like the real world!

Rip succeeds in escaping Brell's cronies, in the process using his super-human he-man type strength (see above statement Number #2) to destroy a limo with his bare hands. If the wrasslin' biz ever peters out for Hogan, he certainly has a future in the auto salvage business. Just like the real world!

Brell does not take this lightly, to say the least. He sends men to cripple Rip's younger wimp brother Rick. Along the way, he discovers the scary man-mountain Zeus (portrayed by "Tiny" Lister, of Friday and The Fifth Element fame). We know his name is this, because ever five seconds he tends to stare into the camera and say it menacingly or yell it in rage. Guy's got serious anger management issues, needless to say. Brell coherses Rip into fighting Zeus the mental giant, and all hell breaks loose. Whta follows is a clash of the titans not seen since....oh...I don't know....maybe the Gorgeous Ladies of Wrestling (or G.L.O.W., to those of you who are wrestle savvy).

Rip wins. Whoop-de-shit. The End. P.S. Somewhere in there Joan Severance fits into all of this as Rip's girlfriend...or something.

Lister and Hogan later in their careers....and it's still hard to tell who ended up more respectable....

All in all, decent time waster for an hour and a half. I wouldn't sell the kids or anything to track down the long out of print VHS....it hasn't made it to DVD yet (as I know of).....and maybe it's for the better. If ya want action like this...just go fire up the WWE on the ol' boob tube and watch it for free...

She-Freak (1967)

2008-04-04T07:27:00.000-07:00

(1967 Mayflower Productions) Director: Byron Mabe Starring: Claire Brennen, Lee Raymond, Lynn Courtney, Bill McKinney, Claude Smith, and Felix Silla

There's a reason why I don't partake in the merriment of mechanical carnival and fairground amusement rides......

...when I was a kid in high school, an amusements vendor that used to service several of the county fairs in my hometown area would stroll into town and take up residence at the local fairground about three days before the county fair, and my friends and I knew it was time to make some quick cash....by climbing the fence and offering our "services" to the ride foreman, helping to assist in the set-up of the rides.....and trust me....the usual gang of idiots that I hung with were not construction engineers by no stretch of the imagination......myself included.

This usually involved myself (and said friends) just hanging out with various carny types, getting stoned and/or liquored up in the back of trailers and chasing "carny-tail" (don't ask). When we did work....it wasn't pretty. Let's just say that at one point in my life, while hanging in a harness upside down from a strut at the top of a ferris wheel , ninety-plus feet in the air with a tool belt...and in one hand some extra nuts and bolts that probably shoulda went somewhere, I began to realize that these things may not be too safe to be on, seeing as how the majority of them are set up in this fashion. Young, stupid kids just looking for beer money with a drop-wrench in their hand don't usually give much thought to safety procedures.

Ride at yer own risk, folks.......

The Plot: Opening with a Texas Chainsaw Massacre style title card sequence (sans the narration, though) which gives thanks to many carnival vendors and disavows that anything of the like of the following picture has ever happened, we are then treated to over five minutes of stock footage of a late 1960s carnival attraction in action while the title sequence is laid out. The dizzying scenes of fairground rides whirling about bring back childhood memories of county fairs past, but goes on way too long. If I wanted to see grubby carnies lazing about pulling brake handles with bright lights and buzzing noises, I'd just put in a day at my workplace and probably get the same effect. Cut to a greasy spoon style southern diner...ran by a guy named "Greasey"! Who'da thunk, eh? Greasy has in his employ one Jade (Claire Brennen), a mouthy trailer trash gal who buses tables in his joint, who dreams of leaving her podunk burg and making something of her life. Don't we all, honey...don't we all. But most of us aren't as bitchy about it.

A carny promoter stops by the joint just as Greasey is trying to put the moves on Jade....he's a slick one. "My wife's outta town. I'm a dirty smelly hick who owns a grease-pit...wanna do it?" Jade, spurning Greasey's Casanova-like charm, begs the promoter for info about obtaining a job with his traveling show, thus getting her fired. No big loss to the food service industry. She joins the carnival, at first working as a waitress (way to reach for the stars, Jade-baby!), where she meets with "Moon", a stripper with the girlie show (meow! The actress in this role is actually a decent looker) and Blackie, the ride foreman. Blackie's yer typical Rus Meyer-type tough guy, whom is a womanizer that Moon warns Jade about. She doesn't listen and has a fling with him. Then Jade falls for the Freak Show owner, a nice guy...whose money is the only thing Jade is interested in. Much to her later regret.

Jade visits the freak show...and is disgusted (FORESHADOWING!!!!!), all the while the owner falls for her, and they have a really quick marriage. So quick that Larry King would be envious. Jade continues to fool around with Blackie, until she's caught by Shorty, the freak show owner's cowboy hat wearin' midget assistant. Jade's hubby catches them in the act, and Blackie stabs him to death, leaving Jade to inherit the show. She mistreats the freaks, firing Shorty, pissing off her friend Moon and acts much like something that rhymes with.....oh...."BITCH" most of the time counting money. But the freaks take their revenge on her for the death of their friend, the sideshow owner....and she ends up an attraction herself! Never in a million years wouldya ever seen that one comin', would ya? Huh? Actually, the ending is pretty well telegraphed from the first ten minutes of the movie....The End.

Produced by David Friedman, a frequent collaborator with H.G. Lewis (2000 Maniacs, Blood Feast), it's easy to mistake this rip-off of Tod Browning's classic FREAKS as one of Lewis' works, because of similar editing techniques and camera set-ups, but was instead directed by Byron Mabe, the man behind the camera on The Acid-Eaters, a 1960s cult drug flick. A decent enough time-waster, worth a few chuckles.....

Tougher Than Leather (1988)

2008-03-23T21:25:00.000-07:00

(1988 New Line Pictures) Director: Rick Rubin Starring: Run DMC, the Beastie Boys, Richard Edson, Jenny Lumet, Russell Simmons

Yes, Yes, y'all....and ya don't stop.....

...ahem. Sorry....just had a flashback to my junior high school days. Like many white kids of my era, my introduction to rap music was Run DMC's multi platinum album "Raisin' Hell", which contained possibly their most popular track, the high energy cover version of Aerosmith's "Walk This Way", in which they were accompanied by the Boys from Boston themselves. I became a huge fan of "the old school" (as the young whipper-snappers call it now...we used to call it "Top 40"), and this group in particular. So naturally, when my "homies" on the internet asked me to join them in a roundtable review event that centered on flicks of a revenge theme, I decided to tackle Run DMC's "epic", Tougher Than Leather....

God...what a dumb movie. It's an oddity...a blaxploitation flick that was released at a time when such fare was just beginning to be seen as "politically incorrect". Then, there's the fact that the principle "actors", even though they may be the "Kings of Rock" (y'know...there ain't none higher) couldn't act to save their lives (this little trait carries through onto the all of the thespians in character roles, too). Add to this a script that steals liberally from about every friggin' blaxpo, crime/revenge, and action film ever made....and ya still have one god-awful dumb-ass movie. Director Rubin should have stuck with what he does best, running recording companies and producing Metallica records, instead of trying to convince the general public that he can make films.

The Plot: During an opening sequence that steals alot from The Blues Brothers, we are introduced to the "mack daddies" (I've been told that I'm "hip" to all the "fresh" slang all the kids are into these days, which I find to be "groovy", "Daddy-O") that are Run DMC. DMC (better known as Darryl McDaniels) is being released in a very Jake Blues/Dolemite fashion from a correctional facility, where he is met by his pals, Run (Joesph Simmons, brother to hip-hop guru Russell) and Jam Master Jay (the late Jason Mizell). Upon hitting the streets again, DMC and his "posse" hook up once again with their manager, Russell Simmons, and make plans to "lay down some funky joints". After witnessing some on-stage sheenanigans of another group that has Russell under their employ.....a very young group of Beastie Boys, who, because of Run DMC's lack of acting ability are real show stealers. And that's not saying much. But we get to witness some of the inaugural stages of the type of sense of humor that would be later employed in the Boys' own sometimes hilarious music videos.

And then, in typical blaxpo fashion....the Man brings down the hammer. Y'all know what "Man" I'm talkin' 'bout. Insanely racist album label Strut Records convinces Russell to get his groups to sign with them, and then the trouble starts.
Owned by Vic Ferrante (director Rubin, proving that not only can he not direct, he can't act either) who uses the business as a front for his mobster father's drug money, Strut is probably a pretty accurate picture of recording companies pre- Sean Combs, sadly. Vic and his cronies seem to have love using the "n" word alot, too. I don't think I've heard it used this much ever outside of any of the films starring Rudy Ray Moore. Run DMC hires Russell's not-to-bright, yet mechanically inclined cousin (don't we all possess one of these?) Runny Ray (Raymond White) as a roadie, who accidentally stumbles upon one of Vic's dope deals gone bad, and gets himself shot. After going to the police , who are seemingly racist, too, and failing to make any head-way on finding Ray's murderer, the Kings of Rock decide to take the law into their own hands, with surprisingly violent results. The End.

It's a scary world, the one presented in Tougher Than Leather, one in which every white person on the planet hates rap music..... and is a senseless bigot. But, instead of being served up as social commentary, this take on 1970s blaxploitation's senseless script and lack of decent direction makes it seem more exploitive than any of it's counterparts from that era. Some decent music tracks by Run DMC and the Beastie Boys are some of the few redeeming factors of this film, though.

Escape From New York: 2 Disc Special Edition DVD

2008-03-22T21:36:00.000-07:00

(2003, 2 disc set) Original release date: 1981 Director: John Carpenter Starring: Kurt Russell, Lee Van Cleef, Harry Dean Stanton, Isaac Hayes, Donald Pleasence, Ernest Borgnine, Adrienne Barbeau

My favorite flick of all-time finally gets the special DVD treatment......

...after a 3 and a half year wait, in 2003 MGM released the two disc "Special Edition" of Escape From New York, and HKC sighed a breath of relief.

To say this is quite possibly my favorite genre flick in the history of the universe is a huge understatement. This is the film that turned me into a lifelong Kurt Russell and John Carpenter fan, way before I even cared or knew who either man was......I just dug Russell as the main character, former Special Forces soldier turned shady criminal and all around bad-ass, S.D. "Snake" Plissken...

My fascination began at the age of seven, in the summer of 1981, when my mother took me to a drive-in showing of the then new flick. I sat in awed amazement of the action on the screen (alternating between bites from one of the greasiest fish sandwiches on planet Earth from the concession stand and a bottle of Barq's cream soda), absorbing every plot point and movement of Plissken, so that "Escape" would become a scenario used in backyard neighborhood games of pretend for years to come. For the next three Halloweens, I went as Snake (this is during the days when seeing a small child on All Hallows Eve walking around with an eye patch and a toy Uzi wasn't grounds for suspecting he'd be plotting a Columbine-type event).

The Plot: Filmed in 1980, and set in 1997 (THE FUTURE!!!), Escape from New York, begins it's tale by proclaiming that in 1988 (THE FUTURE!), the crime rate in the United States would rise a drastic 400 percent, forcing the creation of the USPF (the United States Police Force), a paramilitary group of goons taking back the streets in a desolate future America that has been involved in some sort of conflict with the USSR in Siberia (Plissken is said to be a veteran and war hero of the event). Ah...the good ol' days of the Cold War, when dirty Commies were still bad guys in flicks, even if it was just exposition. The U.S. of this alternate future has all but become a police state of the "Germany in the late 1930s" kind. How is that any different than it really is now with George Dubbaya in office? You can laugh. That's my political humor for the evening, ladies and gentlemen......

Cut to New York Maximum Security Prison, a real swell place to be. If yer absolutely ape-sh*t insane, that is. The Big Apple of the Future has been transformed into one gigantic grey bar motel, the entire island of Manhattan populated by the worst offenders on the USPF's list. The opening narration proclaims "Once you go in....you don't come out." Nice to see that even in the future, Manhattan will be considered a roach motel by the outside world...native New Yorkers, please, calm down. I'm just makin' wit' the funny here. Fergeddaboutit, eh?

This is where we pick up on Snake's story....
Plissken is being processed in for an off-screen robbery of the Federal Reserve in Cleveland (something that the Special Edition DVD reveals on the second disc...an entirely deleted reel one of the flick that shows us this heist and capture).

Seems the President's plane has been brought down in N.Y. by radicals led by Isaac Hayes as the Duke of New York, who wants free passage out of the prison in exchange for the Commander n' Chief (a very British Donald Pleasence), and the USPF commander, Hauk, portrayed by Lee Van Cleef (no wonder Russell went for the Eastwood impression for this flick), has an offer for Snake he can't refuse: Go in, get the Prez out, receive a full pardon...but with a catch...Plissken must do this within 24 hours, or the microscopic explosives Hauk had injected into his neck will blow his head off...

...and then, the fun begins. The End.

Escape from New York is a fun, suspenseful apocalyptic action romp, presented in this two disc set looking better than ever transfer-wise. Some really good special features round out the discs nicely (2 audio commentaries, one with Russell and director Carpenter, always a treat and a fairly informative documentary, "Return to Escape from New York") make this a set worth having, especially for Plissken freaks like me...

CHEAP-ASS REPORT: Manson (1972) Unauthorized Release

2008-03-20T02:34:00.000-07:00

Running Time: 83 minutes MPAA Rating: R
Format: Standard Pan and Scan Audio: Mono
Languages: English Subtitles: None
Region: 0
MSRP: 4.99

Taking a note from my good buddies over at ATTACK OF THE 50 ft. DVD, I've decided to do a Cheap-Ass DVD review using their format. Actually, this was a review that I had submitted to them, but due to the nature of the DVD and it's slightly nefarious back-story, plus the fact that 50 ft. has made an effort throughout it's history to review and feature discs that are easily available through major retail outlets....well, you get the picture.

ABOUT THE MOVIE-
Seen by few (and often banned, according to Mike Weldon' of PSYCHOTRONIC VIDEO GUIDE fame), the 1972 documentary has had a cloud of controversy since it's limited theatrical release by AIP. Compiled of Manson "Family" hippy and free-love antics shot on the Spahn Ranch prior to infamous Sharon Tate murder of August 9, 1969, mixed with news footage of the following trial and interviews with prosecutor Vincent Bugliosi and former Manson associate Jerry Rubin (amongst others), it paints an incredibly creepy picture of Charlie and his motley crew of outcasts and social misfits. Pre-Tate Slaying footage of rantings by his female followers is a high point, in which they practically map out events of things to come by way of their actions...and, even more fear-inducing...the hopes and beliefs of actions they never had a chance to carry out.
Seeing Lynette "Squeeky" Fromme brandishing a high powered rifle and a large knife is enough to give anyone the willies....hard to believe that film was actually nominated for an Oscar in 1972 in the category of Best Documentary category...
Then suddenly as the film appeared....it vanished. Seeing only a limited VHS release at some point in the early 1980s, it seemed to be one of the films that get shuffled off to the side, only to be mentioned from time to time in reference guides and genre-devoted publications...that is, until the year 2000, and a little DVD outfit calling themselves BEVERLY WILSHIRE FILMWORKS.

And this, faithful reader, is where the trouble starts.....

It seems that Beverly Wilshire, in the beginning, was one of the first manufacturers to offer cheap, affordable discs in the days of DVD infancy. Several manufacturers have popped up in times since, but mostly following the example of similar companies from the now-ancient times of the VHS format, meaning that many of their catalogs are filled to the brim with films and other media that has fallen into the Public Domain, .films whose copyright had slipped and no one had renewed making them fair game for anyone with the assets and material to produce copies of them. But, it seems that Beverly Wilshire wasn't exactly on the up and up on such things, and in hindsight, some of their releases seem to have been a little on the illegal side. And MANSON definitely was one. The story goes as follows: Robert Hendrickson, one of the men credited as director of the documentary, still has the rights to the film, and after discovering the Beverly Wilshire Filmworks disc was for sale in such outlets as Amazon.com and eBay...wasn't exactly too happy about it. Because....no one had asked his permission for a DVD release, and he wasn't seeing a dime of any of the sales. So he sues the two online merchants (why he didn't go after the manufacturer of the discs is beyond me...but alot of what the guy does doesn't really make any sense, as evidenced by this site: http://www.exclusivefilms.com/).

Immediately, Amazon and eBay pull any ads for the disc and stop offering it for sale, and as quickly as they sprang onto the scene, Beverly Wilshire disappears like a ghost....

PRESENTATION:
Absolutely terrible. If this was a transfer from film negative, they must have used to worst print in existence. But, after viewing some of Beverly Wilshire's other discs, more than likely a transfer from one of the copies of an earlier VHS release. Incredibly murky picture, with tons of visible emulsion and base damage scratches and lines. The mono audio is filled to the brim with every imaginable hiss and pop capable from dirty 35mm reels. Watchable (I've seen worse transfers) and probably worth about half of the 4.99 SRP you'll have to dish out, but seeing as how this is the only place you can find the film on disc (yet), who'll complain?

EXTRAS:
Unless your way too thrilled by bad choices in a scene selection option than you should be, none at all.
Now, one may inquire...."How does this differ from your regular run of the mill pirate or bootleg DVD?". Well...glad you asked. Because of the simple fact that is was available for sale in several major retail outlets around the country, such as K-Mart and Sam Goody chainstores, as well as the online sources stated previously. And, more surprisingly, still available to those willing to make the hunt in several chain liquidation stores (in limited quantities) like Odd Lots! and Family Dollar stores. Most pirate discs live in the seedy underground venues of fleamarkets and conventions, bartered for by those amongst the fan community, but with a track record like that mentioned above, the MANSON disc may very well be the best distributed bootleg in the existence of the format.

Update: 3/20/2008-

It seems that according to Hendrickson's exclusivefilms.com that at some point in late February of 2008, he will personally be offering a "limited promotional DVD release" of the film, but as the site says: "this Limited Edition offering is being made for promotional purposes only and may be terminated at anytime."

It looks as if his new documentary, "Inside the Manson Family" is just a rehash of footage from the earlier 1973 documentary, as seen in the trailer posted below:

Petey Wheatstraw : The Devil's Son-In-Law (1977)

2008-03-19T20:41:00.000-07:00

(1977) Generation International Pictures Director: Cliff Roquemore Starring: Rudy Ray Moore, Jimmy Lynch, Leroy & Skillet, G. Tito Shaw, Wildman Steve, Ebony Wright

Rudy Ray Moore......
King of the Comedy Records. Dolemite Personified.

The Anti-Christ?

Yeah....that last one surprised the hell outta me, too. (Pun intended) How'd all this happen, you might be asking? Well....let's take a look at the credits...

Oh...look. It's directed by that Roquemore guy...y'know, the one that brought us the joy that is known as The Human Tornado . So ya know it's gotta be quality stuff. Wow...not only are we graced with the presence of Moore himself, why....it's ol' Leroy and Skillet, two of the unfunniest dudes on the face of the planet (kinda like a live action version of "Calvin and the Colonel" ).

And....oh boy! To top things off....it's Wildman Steve! With a name like that....ya know "drunken and disorderly conduct" is the first thing that comes to my mind.

The Plot: We open on a Southern farmhouse, with an unnamed woman in the midst of birth pains. By the size of her stomach....it seems as if she's about to pop. First sign it's a Moore Film: Doctor making the delivery? The crazy cracka sheriff from The Human Tornado . Thus, Petey Wheatstraw is born....leaving the womb aged about 8 years old ,and then proceeding to beat up the doctor and his father (trust me....you can't make this stuff up and have be any more f**king weird). We then cut to an inspiring theme song that contains lyrics about the Devil, Petey, and stand-up comedy....as well as kung-fu (we're treated to a montage of young Mr. Wheatstraw being trained by some old guy...in some arcane style that involves chopping up a watermelon with a katana. I don't get it either...

We cut to the adult Wheatstraw (Moore) who has used his amazing kung fu training to become...you guessed it...a comedian. Sure...that makes sense. Seems Leroy and Skillet are openning a club (backed by the stereotypical evil white man...y'know, "The Man" aka "Whitey"), and want Petey out of the way, so that his incredibly funny comedy act (that involves insulting fat women and ugly men...KOMEDY GOLDMINE!) won't cut into their rival club's opening night profits. By trying to kill him. Wow...Marcel Marceau was right. Comedy IS hard.

And wonder of wonders....they succeed! Well, only after an over-zealous flunkie shoots a kid in Wheatstraw's employ. At the kid's funeral, they shoot up Petey real good....and then he makes a deal with the Devil (G. Tito Shaw) to come back for revenge. The catch? Marry the Devil's incredibly unattractive daughter ( the Tarman from Return of the Living Dead-kinda ugly). He grants Petey amazing powers by way of a magic pimp stick...and then...all Hell breaks loose.

Get it? "Hell"? The Devil? I made a funny. Anyways....this leads to Wheatstraw trying to trick the Devil, unintentionally funny kung-fu battles with some of the goofiest demons in history (look kinda like...ballerinas?) and yet another film to Moore's credit that defies logic and proves to be so funny it must be seen.....

Justice League of America (Unaired Pilot, 1997)

2008-03-17T03:33:00.000-07:00

(1997 Warner Bros. TV?) Director: Félix Enríquez Alcalá Starring: Matthew Settle .... Guy Gardner/Green Lantern Kimberly Oja .... Tori Olafsdotter/Ice (as Kim Oja) John Kassir .... Ray Palmer/The Atom Michelle Hurd .... B.B. DaCosta/Fire Kenny Johnston .... Barry Allen/The Flash David Ogden Stiers .... J'onn J'onzz/Martian Manhunter Miguel Ferrer .... The Weather Man (Dr. Eno)

This thing wasn't nearly as bad as I expected....which isn't saying much. Though I will admit that I might be desensitized the stimuli...I mean I've seen alot of really bad superhero flicks (Rat Pfink a Boo Boo and Supersonic Man come to mind)...and contrary to popular belief, Marvel Comics hasn't exactly cornered the market on bad superhero film adaptations (Steel with Shaq, for example....or the 1960s Wonder Woman pilot that never aired...

The Plot: Metro City begins suffering from terrorist attacks by a mysterious weather controlling villain known as The Weather Man who broadcasts threats on the airwaves, which piques the curiosity of the Justice League of America....or at least a very dysfunctional facsimile of said. There's Guy Gardner, the Green Lantern....who has woman troubles. There's Barry Allen, the Flash, who can't hold a job and is a good natured dumb ol' lug who's incredibly impulsive. The Atom, science teacher Ray Palmer, has issues with his self esteem. And Fire...well, she's a struggling actress.

Waitaminnit.

I've been reading DC Comics for nearly 30 years...and none of these characterizations and plot points seem familiar. When did the JLA become a really bad episode of "Friends"? To add to the confusion, the show's structured in flashbacks, mainly centered around the character of Tori, a researcher working on weather manipulation who a.) gains superpowers via a blacklight bulb and some dry ice smoke, and b.) just happens to work with the surprise bad guy, portrayed by the always enjoyable Miguel Ferrer (a long-time comic book fanatic himself and collaborator with Bill Mumy (yeah...the "Will Robinson" guy) on the mid-1980s Marvel Comics mini-series, Comet Man)

The End. Obviously inspired by J.M. DeMattesis and Keith Giffen's comedic "revamp" of the Justice League concept in the mid-1980s (which is currently enjoying a new surge of reader interest via the writing duo's incredibly witty "Formerly Known As the Justice League" material coming out of DC Comics as of late), the Justice League of America pilot film suffers from trying to be too funny, in my opinion. The obvious attempt to stress the point that these particular interpretations of classic DC heroes are "ordinary" people with regular problems is taken to an extreme that makes them not sympathetic (as the people behind the production hoped), but instead terribly cliched and laughable....thankfully, the folks at WB didn't make the same mistakes when producing the great Justice League and Justice League Unlimited animated projects a few years later.....

All in all, production value and performance-wise, not a bad effort....it's not like we can blame the actors for a script that's obviously lacking in substance. Recommended for only hard-core DC fans only....

Mitchell( 1975)

2008-03-13T03:38:00.000-07:00

( 1975 Allied Artists) Director: Andrew V. MacLaglen Starring: Joe Don Baker, Martin Balsam, John Saxon, Linda Evens, Merlin Olsen

I first became aware of this unintentional comedy goldmine through Mystery Science Theatre 3000....

...as a matter of fact, the "Mitchell" episode (episode #512, for MST3k freaks out there) was the first of the Rhino Home Video VHS cassettes of the series that I ever purchased, circa 1996. In the days since, I still consider it to be one of the funniest, if not the funniest episode of the series. Host Joel Hodgeson and the bots were so merciless in their heckling, that it's rumored that actor Joe Don Baker is actually pissed off at the show's creators. And, I don't blame him....I would be, too...if one of my current claims to fame is being the target of a constant barrage of fat and drunk jokes.

For years, I actually wanted to experience the torment and pain that is the uncut MITCHELL. Just to see for myself if this flick was as bad as it's made out to be by MST3k. I mean, this was Joe Don Baker...my hero from Walking Tall flicks as a kid. Y'know...James Bond's "Ugly American" buddy. And, John Saxon was in it....the coolest guy in American film, circa the 1970s. How could it be bad? MST3k musta been mistaken, seeing as how they had to make sense out of an obviously cut and chopped edit of a print.

Boy....was I in the wrong. In a BIG way.

Oh, dear God....why?

Watching MITCHELL (well, watching it sober, at least) is like viewing home movie footage taken of your favorite uncle, circa 1975. Y'know the one....everybody has that one uncle whose the "lovable lush" of the family, the one that was married more than once, but stayed a bachelor the majority of his existence. The one from family photo albums whose pictures never seem to be absent of the presence of a beer can of some kind, like it was surgically bonded to his hand.

The Plot: Joe Don Baker is "Mitchell"...whether it's his first or last name is unclear (even to himself, it seems), for it's never mentioned one way or another throughout the course of the film. As the DVD case cover-blurb points out, he's a cop "with a gun, a drink, and no friends" in an unspecified American city (one assumes that it's Los Angeles) who's assigned to tail and pester a scummy druglord named Cummings (Martin Balsam) into a confession about a large shipment of heroin he's supposedly filtering in the country. Mitchell is a no-nonsense kinda cop, shooting civilians purely out of suspect and launching into investigations based on hunches and instinct. That's the problem, I guess, with the American legal system...too much time spent worrying about petty stuff like "evidence" and "probable cause". He has an uncanny method of legwork and keen deductive practices, which seem to involve sleeping with hookers (Linda Evans), drinking beer, and a series of dumbfounded looks (for an example, see below).

Upon investigating the uncut MITCHELL, one finds a few scenes that are missing from the MST3k version that stand out-
-Mitchell getting revenge on the Mustang driving hitman
- Mitchell kills a guy with a blow to the head with a rock (the footage which makes up the slow motion opening credit sequence can be seen here)
-Mitchell has a dune-buggy fight with Deaney (John Saxon), the burgular killin', male chauvanist bad guy, which ends in his fiery death (which finally explains where Saxon disappeared to in the MST3k cut)
-an extended verbal bout with the Adam Rich-like skateboard kid, the original track surprisingly contains the phrase "piss off" instead of "buzz off"!

All in all, it's not a bad movie....just alot of really bad performances. Definitely not Joe Don's shining moment (if he ever really had one to begin with). Stick with the MST3k treatment, unless you are a Baker completist....

The Wrestling Women vs. The Aztec Mummy (1963)

2008-03-13T03:18:00.000-07:00

(1963 Azteca Pictures)
Director: Rene Cardona
Starring: Lorena Velázquez, Armando Silvestre, Elizabeth Campbell, María Eugenia San Martín, Chucho Salinas, Ramón Bugarini

For those of you staring in disbelief at the title....yes, this is an actual film.....

...and, with a title like that (I'll admit that it does sound like something you'd find these days on late-night Cinemax) it's bound to be goofy. One of the infamous Mexican imports that savvy exploitation producer K.Gordon Murray purchased the rights to, dubbed into English and unleashed upon unsuspecting viewers in the mid-1960s, The Wrestling Women vs. The Aztec Mummy is an odd mismatch to very popular Mexi-genres; the luchadore and horror film.

The Plot: When the very "Fu Manchu-esque" villain The Black Dragon begins kidnapping and killing Mexican scientists in his insane quest to obtain a lost Aztec treasure (isn't every frigging one of these flicks about the search for Aztec gold?), the nephew of one of the researchers, Mike (Armando Silvestre) decides to investigate. And, as coincidence would have it, assisting the young man are his girlfriend and her friend, who just happens to be the "wrestling women" of the title. After several fumbling attempts by the Black Dragon to halt their research into the matter.....trust me, he's no Lex Luthor....the plot finally ends up with everyone on the trail of the above mentioned bountiful amount of gold located conveniently at the local spooky ol' Aztec pyramid.

In the midst of all this mess that someone thought was a good idea to call a "plot", there's several sequences of stock wrestling footage, the most hilarious of which involve the Wrasslin' Gals against the Dragon's deadly female judo masters. Even the most die-hard fan of the luchadore genre will find it hard to stifle a chuckle....

The Alligator People (1959) DVD

2008-03-10T23:40:00.000-07:00

Tech Stuff:
Running Time: 74 minutes
MPAA Rating: Not Rated
Format: Anamorphic Widescreen 2.35:1
Audio: Dolby Stereo 5.1
Languages: English, Spanish
Subtitles: English, Spanish
Region: 1
MSRP: $9.98

The Flick:
I've wanted to see this film for years, ever since I was a kid and saw a trailer for it included on a compilation VHS of cheapo horror hosted by John Zacherly..because even then, I found it hilarious. Plus, where else are ya gonna see an obviously drunk Lon Chaney Jr., playing a drunk Cajun? A drunk Cajun with a hook for a hand obsessed with killin' 'gators? I rest my case....

Beverly Garland portrays Jane Marvin, a young newlywed who suffered every bride's nightmare: her beau abandoning her on their wedding night. Well, that, and he might be some kinda freakish mutant aliigator person, which she comes to suspect after a little search for him leads her to the bayou, where she meets mad scientist Dr. Sinclair (George MacReady) and gator hatin' creepy local Manon (Chaney).
Is Jane's husband a filthy swamp lovin' mutant, a product of Sinclair's experiments in radiation and reptile glands, with hopes of regenerating tissue for accident victims? Or, is she just crazy? Find out as the plot unfolds...

The Alligator People isn't high brow science fiction, but it is a helluva lotta fun...and worth a few unintentional laughs....

Extra Crap:
Nothing to speak of, other than four trailers for other Fox DVD releases: The Fly (1958), The Fly (1986), The Omen, and The Phantom of Paradise

Shock Treatment: 25th Anniversary Edition (1981)

2008-03-10T23:18:00.000-07:00

Tech Stuff:
Running Time: 92 minutes
MPAA Rating: PG
Format: Widescreen 1.85:1
Audio: Dolby Surround 5.1
Languages: English, Spanish
Subtitles: English, Spanish, French
Region: 1
MSRP: $14.98

The Flick:
Filmed in 1981, SHOCK TREATMENT holds a very unique place in the realm of studio marketting: while most major studio marketting is geared towards creating the next "blockbuster" moneymaker or at the least making a quick buck and pulling the product from screens, it's quite possibly the first time that a major studio greenlit a project with hopes of creating a cult following. The story goes as follows: At some point in the early 1980s, the brass at 20th Century Fox took notice of a little phenomena that was occurring called The Rocky Horror Picture Show....

Rocky Horror had a very limited release during it's theatrical run, made very little money, and quickly disappeared from several venues....but,.....

...A little novelty known as the midnight showing had attracted a very loyal and rabid fanbase, gathering every Friday or Saturday night at select inner city and arthouse theatres. And, surprisingly.....6 or 7 years after the film's debut....Richard O'Brien's little perverted musical was making money. Not alot...but it was steady money. The little film about a transvestite alien and his singing and dancing friends that nobody knew what to do with during it's intial run was still generating revenue. So, someone at Fox decided that it was a brilliant idea to snag the guys behind this "Rocky Horror" thing (director Jim Sharman and composer/co-writer Richard O'Brien) and have'em crank out another one of these babies. And this time, they'd play it smart....they'd try and pawn it of not on a huge general audience, but instead market it to the smaller niche fringe that had embraced the earlier film.

All logical ideas.....but, surprise, intially it failed. Afte avery limited release, the film disappeared and inhabited that limbo of relative obscurity that several films of it's type lived in that were produced in the early 1980s, popping up for a few small VHS releases and nothing more. Which should go to prove just how intangible a concept a "cult following" is. It's something that can't exactly be created....it just sorta happens (someone should fill-in Charles Band and Lloyd Kaufman on this). Even if all the ingredients are there, there's no guarantee. That's the fun of b-films and cult movies....you never exactly know what or why a small, select part of the audience is gonna find endearing enough to show further devotion to.

The story (in hindsight) is fairly inventive and to a creepy extent prophetic about the way we intake our media and pop culture today....O'Brien and Sharman are playing around with the concepts of media manipulation and reality television shows a full two decades before much attention was being thrust on them, which was followed by astronomic amounts of popularity. Brad and Janet Majors return from Rocky Horror, finally married and at a point in which, to say the least, the honeymoon's over. After becoming contestants on a game show, the real horror begins as Brad is locked away in a sanitarium and Janet (portrayed here by Jessica Harper) is molded into a shallow media star by bad guy media mogul Farley (half of a brilliant dual role performed by Cliff DeYoung, who also stars as Brad Majors).

The music's a step above...I say this because while I may enjoy the tunes of The Rocky Horror Picture Show more, I tend to listen to the soundtrack of Shock Treatment more often, because the tracks included in it show a sense of growth for O'Brien as a songwriter, especially the title tune.

Interestingly enough, SHOCK TREATMENT, due to renewed interest amongst RHPS fandom via convention showings, has finally garnered the cult following it deserves, and this 25th anniversary DVD release was welcomed with more fanfare than Fox was able to generate in theatres a couple of decades ago.

Extra Crap:
Full Length Audio Commentary by SHOCK TREATMENT Fan Club Presidents "Mad Man Mike" and Bill Brennan- Really informative and fun...these guys know their stuff and make it as light as possible.

DTV Presents: A Shockumentary: Nice littel featurette taking us behind the scenes with stories about the pre-production and filming.

Let's Rock n' Roll: Shock Treatment's Super Score Featurette: A retrospective look at the folks behind the songs of the film.

Original Theatrical Trailer
International Trailer

Faster Pusycat! Kill! Kill! (1965)

2008-03-10T20:17:00.000-07:00

(1965 Eve Pictures) Director: Russ Meyer Starring: Tura Satana, Haji, Lori Williams, Sue Bernard, Stuart Lancaster, Paul Trinka
Y'know....he had me at "breasts"....

I can remember my first encounter with the works of director Russ Meyer. At some point during my high school days, some friends and myself were all hanging out at a mutual buddy's place late one night, and while lounging around after a few beers, quite possibly one of the oddest things (up to that point in my existence) I had ever seen on late night cable television made it's way across the screen of said friend's living room boob tube.

After a slight bout of disorientation caused by paranoia brought on by doubts as to whether or not I was "holding my liqour" as well as I thought I had been, my friend informs me, "Oh...you've never seen BEYOND THE VALLEY OF THE DOLLS before? They've been playing it alot lately on cable...it was directed by this Meyer guy....most of his films are really huge breast obsessed, and then there's "Faster Pussycat"..."

"What? The shitty hair-rock band?", I reply.
"No, no, no....the movie. "Faster Pussycat! Kill! Kill!" Oh man...you have to see FASTER PUSSYCAT..it's f**king great. Big breasted biker chicks who have nothing better to do thatn kick the sh** outta some truly obnoxious dudes..."

As I said...he had me at "breasts"...

This led to a few weeks later, where my friend presented me with a T-180 VHS cassette. "Here.", he said, "My uncle dubbed these for ya from his VHSs. FASTER PUSSYCAT! KILL! KILL!, DERANGED, and and I think there are a few episodes of "Kids In The Hall" on there you've been wanting for awhile..."

This was my introduction to the esteemed Mr. Meyer's work. I then sought out such titles as UP!, VIXEN, MUDHONEY (a personal favorite), and a few others, and discovered there was more than breast-obsession going on. What I found was an odd filmmaking style, filled with an almost unflinching look at a man's specific vices, with sometimes minimalist plots (or something resembling them). It was as if the exploitation sensibilities of Doris Wishman had meshed with the penchant for grue that H.G. Lewis' work exhibited, as well as Lewis' marketting savvy. Meyer's work also seems to attempt social commentary and/or satire on certain levels. There's a crazy masochistic philosophy here that borders on dadaism, folks....ya just have to look past the very obvious T&A.

The Plot: Tura Satana is Varla, a mean as nails she-wolf whose main kicks seem to be belittling men and racing cars. She's joined by two chicks that she jiggles her assets with down at the local go-go bar, Billie and Rosie. After an incredibly confusing car race with a local kid accompanied by his girlfriend, Varla snaps at the possibility of being bested by a man, and does the logical thing: Karates him to death and then snaps his neck.

What? That's not an acceptable way to settle matters of sportsmanship amongst auto racers? It should be. Make NASCAR ten times more enjoyable for me. Anyways, they kidnap Linda (said gal-pal of dead man) and plan their next move: move in on a local miser and his hulking retard son so's they can steal his horded away cash. As you can tell so far, Varla and the gals don't really think these things out too well. Things go wonky when they come to find out that the geezer is bat-sh*t insane, having been hit by a train years back and confined to a wheelchair. He's paranoid and likes guns,too. The Vegetable (no kidding...this is how Dennis Busch's character is creditted), aka aforementioned retard man-boy, seems to have a problem with women. He just keeps....breaking...potential brides. Whoopsy.

The miser has a second son, who rebels after falling for the kidnapped girl (remember her?) and they make an escape run, which ends grisly for Varla, who meets the business end of a car's grill. The End.
Borderline male power fantasy softcore....or relevant social commentary on the so-called "war of the sexes"?

Depends on your testosterone level, possibly. Still highly reccommended ......